miss stina

I don't know why, but I stayed up till 4am last night reading revenge plots that people have exacted on their exes and other ppl. Read this:


SHEETS OF ICE PISS!

Best revenger ever, aside from shooting the bastard.

Anyway, this is how it works.

Utensils:

4 Mates
Case of Beer
Thin cooking trays
A Cup
Coat hangers (3 or 4)
Plyers
Screw driver
Fridge/Freezer

Method:

Consume beers with friends. When needing to go for a piss, pee in cup. Poor contents from cup into thin cooking tray. Place trays into freezer. Wait until contents are frozen! Take trays out from freezer. Gently remove frozen piss from tray. Now using a screw driver, and a stabbing motion, try and make a hole close to the edge of the frozen piss. You don't want it to be a big hole, just enough for coat hanger wire to go through. Quickly move to 'victims' house.

Now, grab the coat hangers and straighten them out. Join 3 or 4 coat hangers together using plyers. Be sure to put a hook on the last coat hanger so it can be hooked on the hole of the frozen ice piss sheet.

Gently feed the flat frozen ice piss under the 'victims' door (there should be a small gap between door and ground). Using the coat hangers push that sheet of ice piss to desired length. Wiggle and jiggle that coat hanger (like you've been snagged in fishing) so it unhooks from the frozen piss. Do this until all the ice sheets of piss you froze, are in the victims house.

Leave the premises.

If you do it right, this fucker will be cleaning the stenchy piss stains off his carpet, and not having any fuckn clue where it came from (unless a pet is present in the house).

FAQ:

Q1. I don't have a friends, or any other of the utensils?
A1. This task will be useless, grab a gun and shoot the fucker.

Q2. When i stab the frozen ice piss sheets, chunks just break off?
A2. You will have to use something smaller and sharper and 'chip' away at it.

Q3. My sheets of frozen ice piss unfroze before i got to victims house?
A3. You should do it at a 'friends' place next time who lives closer to victim.

Q4. My sheets of frozen ice piss won't fit under the door?
A4. You need to use thinner cooking trays. duh!

Q5. Have you tried this before and did it work?
A5. Sure did! the dick at the uni deserved it.

Enjoy! and good luck!


......Oh. My. Lord. When I read that I COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING. Sheets of ice piss? That's sooooo awesome! Some other revenge stories included:

1. Feeding the ex 'beef stew' made from dog food
2. Toothbrush dipped in toilet
3. Pouring water over their carpet, then scattering alfalfa sprout seeds everywhere
4. Prawn shells in the curtain rods
5. Keying their cars
6. Scooping out their margarine and taking a dump in the container, then putting it back in the fridge
7. Giving away all their clothes to charity

But the best one by far is frozen sheets of ice piss!! Hahahaha